When I was a Senior at UL (a million moons ago) I remember going through something very distinct- something I would learn a little about as I then left Louisiana for 'higher' goals.......the feeling of detachment. It's hard you know, to come to a University, to get comfortable, to make friends and to find that home away from home - and then it seems in such a short time..you've got 21, 18, 12 hours left and Graduation is around the corner. What do you do with that home you've made and the new family you've found?
I found that emotionally I started to detach long before graduation. Luckily physically I stayed put for the most part and tried to savor every last minute of certain community that I could. I'm saying all this because lately I've been praying for and reflecting alot on you-the Seniors (and some Juniors) at Wisdom. I've been watching closely and noticed something a little troubling to me- you've all been vanishing. Oh, I know graduation and even upper level classes require alot of time and attention. Maybe you've just got the 'socializing' out of your system. Maybe not.
I've heard some say that they feel Wisdom doesnt feed them anymore. They want something deeper, something to challenge them. I've read survey responses, clearly from older students saying these things and more-some nice, some hard to hear and I've prayed with them and I've wracked my brain and I've asked some of you individually and I've ended up here.
It's not about numbers for me, though I know sometimes ministry and evangelization can become that. I really could care less if we have 'the most popular thing on campus' or not. True Christianity won't ever be the most popular thing on campus. As C.S. Lewis once said "Christianity has not been tried and found wanting. It has been found difficult and left untried." And it's true, if we arent wildly unpopular in some sense then we're doing something wrong. We all know that those seeking faith are the most authentically human...unfortunately the rest of the campus hasn't figured that out yet. I'm praying that they do and I'll pass out flyers and chalk sidewalks and plan conferences until they all come home, if thats what it takes.
No, I don't have a naturally 'evangelistic' spirit in me. What I have is a strong, driven (call it motherly) need to care for those that have been entrusted to me...I.E. You. You especially, as older students are of concern to me because you are about to get spit into the 'real world' and that is a memory that is still somewhat fresh in my mind.
I've watched a good majority of my friends (love you if you're reading this) lose their faith and their moral compass in that 'real world' and I've done the same myself on more than one occasion. The only reason I'm 'still standing' is solely by the grace of God and by clinging to every 'Church' job, community, opportunity that I've found since I said goodbye to Wisdom in 2002.
It is a reality and if it's not my job to ensure that you have ALL of the tools you need to be able to stay in, form and find good Catholic communities to grow in faith with- then I don't know what is.
I'll be honest with you, you need formation in the faith, you need friends to pray with, you need to give your time to those younger and less formed than yourself and you need the grace of God.
So, now that I've told you what you need...why don't you do the same.
What do you need? What is it that you need from Wisdom? How can I get you involved again? What can I do better?
Feel free to be honest. I can take it :) I love all of you and I'm looking forward to your responses.
http://ragincajuncatholics.blogspot.com
Amy, I really find your note heart warming. And I feel like we are all so blessed to have someone who will do anything to keep me and my other classmates around. But I have to admit that I am one of those people who have probably drifted off of the physical properties of campus more and more. But I want you to know that this decision(s) have never been out of a lack of ministering nor sense of maturity. It is simply that my day consists of classes, a butt-load, of homework, internships, then a better paying job all on top of that. And when I am not doing any of those you best be sure I am taking a nap! I know that this sounds like a load of excuses, but I am extremely nervous about graduating and about securing a job. I am not graduating in a highly accepted field and there fore I feel the need to invest my time in these internships, seminars, and lectures. Not to say that I can speak for everyone, but I can speak for myself in this matter. I want you to know that I am thoroughly impressed with the activities going on at Wisdom and I will say once again that I feel like no one holds a light to UL's Catholic Ministry. But right now I couldn't sleep at night if I went to a Wisdom function over something that may secure a job. But I will go to what I can and I have continued meeting with spiritual directors at Wisdom in the meantime. But please I ask for your patience and understanding of those of us who are a little more nervous than others about our future events.
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